Delicate in the Morning

I’m delicate in the mornings. tears can slip out so easily. my face moistened, dewy grass. I am the twilight sky in summer dawn. searching for the light. with nothing but a looking glass and a heavy bag of blight. Yet I’m so light. you’d think I could take flight if it wasn’t for my…

What I Want To Do

I really want to make people laugh. I want to move people. I want to shake people. I want them to be filled with emotion, and I really want to make them laugh. I want to tell jokes and stories that I find solace in on stage floors, under bright unflattering lights, while sharing laughs…

mind inventing murphy’s law

whenever. whenever I think about something that I enjoy, a person, an event, I can’t find the right words and it’s so annoying. My racing mind is like a word search except the word bank keeps changing places. but I always can clearly think of how things can go wrong. Of how actors or real…

I Am Obsessed.

I am obsessed with engorging myself. Partly because I haves an oral fixation, another part is the glamour that surrounds the luxury of having snacks and bountiful amounts of food, only a glamour enjoyed by narcissistic first worlders aka Americans. Partly because eating feeds the delusion that I am filling a void – you see…

For Manchester.

Above is a photo of thousands of people gathering in Albert Square to remember victims of the Manchester bombing attack that occurred last night. 22 people’s lives ended yesterday. 59 were wounded. An entire country has been scarred once again. In fact they are still recovering from the London attack which occurred less than 3…

Drugs: My All Time Favorite Crush

drugs. my all time favorite crush: I rest my arms on them when I get tired, and use them to prop myself up when I don’t have the energy to do it myself, I use them to move forward. I use them to help me guide myself into the next day without free falling facefirst…

So Fucking Annoying.

anxiety is so fucking annoying. being worried about the future is so fucking annoying. obsessive thoughts are so fucking annoying. eczema is so fucking annoying. ugly skin is so fucking annoying. not being able to relax is so fucking annoying. constantly being driven by a vice is so fucking annoying. having physical and mental health issues…

drugs, scabs, and attention.

drug addiction is a hell of a drug. vices are a hell of a drug. self medication. distraction. a cloak to protect you from reality. vices are so necessary as we are being bombarded with constant sensory stimuli, we have to find something that we feel gives our brains a break. vices such as a…

men, peacocks and femme culture

Men do nothing but purchase proverbial peacock feathers in an attempt to flex in front of women to get their attention. I don’t know if you’re familiar with the peacock mating process but it includes a the male peacock performing an elaborate dance and spreading his feathers. The male peacocks are actually the only ones…

little spurts of sadness: a series

spurt 1: 6:45 pm having self sabotage sessions as I rack my brain on what is and what isn’t appropriate to write. I don’t mean to get meta but I’m just trying to say what’s on my mind. because I’ve got something to say. Glory Box blasts in my ears, catharsis, nostalgia and melancholia is…

JUST DO IT

So I’m sitting here again, Thinking about how much of a failure I am; but I’ve been spending a lot of time around beautiful talented women of color with endless potential so why am I feeling so down? perhaps my subconscious is ringing the alarm to let me know IT. IS TIME. TO GET. YOUR…

emergency post due to aching of a heart:

I am feeling more alone and hopeless than ever. I’m not sure what triggered this; the full moon. an imminent period, or my mind’s favorite, with a trigger like a hairpin; Bud. He texted me last night asking me two weeks into the month if I still wanted my abandoned items that I openly told…