My head be hurting from all the thoughts I won’t let out. From all the stifled screams and shouts, from all the what ifs, and self doubts, from all the pain, I insist on gaining,
because I can’t control my weight.
Because I can’t find the tools that I need to shape my fate.
I am fading. I am disintegrating.
energy, my aura,
my will to live is dissipating.
I’m reaching out
at ghosts that cannot see me.
Perhaps, I am the ghost. perhaps I am just dreaming. All I know is I hear screaming.
A cry for help,
that can’t be heard through words,only seen in failures and slip ups,and mistakes and the fact. I don’t know how to give myself a break,the fact I don’t know how much that I can take, and I fear what I’ll do when I realize…
there’s no changing the person behind these eyes.
But for help, I still can’t cry.